FREE Webinar: 5 Steps to Transform from Victim to Victor

Life is too Short to Let Victim Define You

Your story is so much more than what "happened" to you.  

I got all caught up in my victim story.  It was comfortable there.  I could talk about it.  I could let it comfort me.  I could let it determine how I acted. My life made sense.

I hung onto my story because I was afraid to let it go.  Letting it go felt like I would fall into a dark abyss filled with nothing and no-one. I was terrified of the emptiness that I thought would be the result of letting my story go.

When I did decide to let that story go and let go of the past hurts, I walked into my greatest story. One that keeps growing and improving.   I realized that my story had taught me so much about what I wanted in my life.  What was acceptable and who I would embrace on my new journey. Consciously deciding to let my past go, was the most terrifying and rewarding experience rolled together! I am so happy I stepped out of my past, healed and stepped into my brilliant present. I want to share my 5-Steps to Transform from Victim to Victor I'm hosting a Free Webinar that will give you the tools to take the leap. In this FREE Webinar, you will discover how to... Let Go of Your Fear Boldly Change Your Story Create Big Authentic Changes Embrace your Victor Life is too Short to Let Victim Define You Thursday, 29 October 2015, at 08:00 pm EST; 09:00 AST Click Here to Register See you on Thursday, Susan xo PS: Please share with your friends and colleagues. Click the social share buttons and let others know about this life-changing Free Webinar!

5-Signs You Are Holding on to the Past for Dear Life

You did it.  You took the first step and left him behind and I want to congratulate you for the courageous step you took when you left your toxic, emotionally abusive partner.

It was a bad relationship and you were consistently criticized, bullied, ridiculed, and abandoned. You decided that it was time to say goodbye to the person and walk out the door.  You decided you want and deserve a better life. 

But there's a problem that's standing in your way of a your new, life and happiness:  You are holding on to your Past for Dear Life.

5-Signs that You are Guilty of Holding On:

1. You won't stop talking about it.  The incident I mean.  You want to tell everyone who will listen and even those who don't want to but are stuck! 
2. You fully embrace your victim label.  You hold onto your story and keep telling it so you can rationalize your "victimness" and hang on to it for dear life.
3. You haven't moved forward.  Not one little step.  You can only be a validated victim if you stay right where you are.
4. You haven't set any new goals.  No new action steps to change your life.  You haven't set a dream or rekindled a passion.  Nothing.  Just stuck.
5. You are losing friends, family, colleagues and acquaintances.  People are jumping ship.

When you leave a toxic, painful relationship, you leave with scars on your heart but you also leave with your Free Will to Create a Life You Love.  But in order to embrace your new happiness and heal your scars, you have to leave your story in the past. You have to let go of your victim; she's holding you back.

The most common reason for hanging on for dear life is familiarity.  It is a familiar place to be.  You are a victim and there is safety in that label.  If you hang on to your story and your hurt then no one else can get in and do it again. 

It's scary to let go of something familiar and let yourself fall freely into your new chapter.  But it is the best and only thing to do when you want to embrace and love yourself unconditionally.

While you're holding on to your "victim", you are closing off a space for your victor to flourish. Victors love themselves unconditionally.  They recognize that they have taken big, bold, courageous steps to freedom and they celebrate their tenacity.  Victors thrive and create a life that has meaning to them. They wake up in the morning ready for their next adventure.  They are fully and completely alive.

Victors know what they want, what is acceptable and how they will achieve their goals.

Your Victor Blossoms When You Release Your Victim

I cannot express to you the joy and the fun you will have in your life when you decide to let your victim go! There is no future in holding on!

I know it's scary but you are worth the plunge.  Once you let the victim go, you will begin to see all the possibilities that are available to you.  And your hands and heart will be open to grabbing on to them. 

You're amazing and you're on your way to a fantastic life built by you, for you.

___________________

Are You Ready to Thrive: Live Life Fearlessly?

Download the 5-Steps to Transform from Victim to Victor Workbook:  

Get It Now!

I help women discover the big, bold, blissful lives they deserve! Ready to reclaim your future and start thriving? Book your free Discovery Session now!

5-Steps to Transform from Victim to Victor

You made a courageous, big, bold decision to leave a toxic relationship and I want to congratulate you for your tenaciousness!

It takes a lot of determination and sometimes a leap of faith to finally say: "That's it, I've had enough. I'm outta here!"

Because of your fabulous decision to ditch your tormentor, you are no longer experiencing that person's daily verbal and emotional assaults. You have stepped into your Freedom and now you have two paths to choose from:

1)  The Path of the Victim:

Wallowing in self-pity, victim, sufferer, depressed, unhappy, blaming, complaining, hopeless

Falling down as victim, wallowing in self-pity,or being a sufferer reverses your big, bold, step.  Once you accept a victim-mentality you spend your precious time looking for someone to blame or complaining in general.

It is a no-win model! There is no value in continuing to focus on the whys, maybes, and what ifs. It is not a healing model.  It’s a model that keeps your tied to your toxic relationship and living in the past.

2) The Path of the Victor:

Survivor, Thriver, Victor, Courageous, Confident, Inspired, Happy, Grateful, Hopeful

Choose the Path of the Victor!

Stepping into life as a Victor and the Creator of Your Own Destiny is empowering, enriching, and lifesaving.  When you're the Victor, you see each step you take in your healing journey as progress. You don't look back or want to find explanations for the past.  You want to experience your life, your way, in the present moment while creating your amazing future.

Life is short.  Sometimes it can be cut even shorter.  When you emerge as a Victor ready to take on the challenge of claiming responsibility for your life and your actions, you don't waste precious time rehashing the past looking for answers because you're way too busy having fun, setting goals, and seeing your future as an adventure of your making.

The victor is not afraid to fail, or feel uncomfortable by the effort required to work hard and succeed.

5-Steps to Transform From Victim to Victor

Step One - Gratitude, Gratitude and More Gratitude

There is always something to be grateful for.  The smallest of things bring me the greatest gratitude. When you are “stuck” or feeling down, gratitude will provide the way out.  Gratitude puts situations into perspective. When we can see the good as well as the bad, it becomes more difficult to complain and stay stuck.  Gratitude focuses our attention on what we have.

Step Two - Let it Go!

What can I release? Let go of?  I bet you're holding on to all kinds of negative junk.  The junk you're holding on to is cluttering your mind and your path forward.  Yeah, that's the truth! The things you hold on to, bear grudges or perhaps feel angry and hurt about cloud your mind and prevent you from being the best you can be.

Step Three - Building Your Relationship with Authentic You

The authentic self is the real, genuine you. It is the you that is buried deep and is the very core of your being. The authentic self is a culmination of all things that are you – knowledge, talents, skills, attitude, and perspective. It isn’t defined by your placement in a family unit or career. 

Finding the truth about who you really are and what is important to you takes honesty, awareness, and some time. 

Step Four - Get in Front of Your Challenges

It is so easy to get stopped dead in your tracks when you start to think about all the challenges in your path.  In fact, when you overthink your “to do” list, you could give up on your journey and I don’t want you to do that!

Challenges are everywhere in your life.  It’s not the challenge that will keep you stuck, it’s how you handle it.  And the best way to handle challenges is to get out in front of them.

Step Five - Embrace Your Possibilities

One of the most powerful tools anyone can use on a daily basis is Positive Affirmations. Every time you write or say your affirmation, you are reinforcing your new positive belief and overwriting your old negative one.

You're Ready to Thrive: Live Life Fearlessly

Download the 5-Steps to Transform from Victim to Victor Workbook:  

Get It Now!

I help women discover the big, bold, blissful lives they deserve! Ready to reclaim your future and start thriving? Book your free Discovery Session now!

Victim or Victor? Which One Will You Choose?

Choose Wisely.  There is a tremendous amount of Power in One Word.

When my toxic-violent relationship ended, I was thrust into the "victim" services mentality which is, unfortunately, the prevalent and preferred way of handling survivors of abuse.

Being labelled a Victim almost killed me.  Being a Victim almost robbed me of the amazing life I have created for myself.  I would have loved to have known the power of being a Victor.  My journey would have been shorter and less self-destructive.

You are only a victim while it's happening.  Victimness is fleeting. Let yourself be a victim for too long and you will rob yourself of a big, bold, ballsy life.

Stepping away from someone who is abusing you is a courageous and "victorious" act. You are now a Victor. You are free of your tormentor, you a strong, worthwhile woman who is capable of achieving anything you set your mind to.

After all, you just walked away from your abuser.  Nothing shouts Victor louder than that!

Claiming your Victor status, immediately puts the incident in the past where it belongs and keeps you moving forward.


Mindset Shifting From Victim to Victor

Victim - I can't believe that happened to me.  I wish I knew why then I might be able to fix what's wrong with me

Victor - It happened, it felt like shit and I left.  I am capable of putting me first and I'm worth it

Victim - I wonder what other people think about me. They probably see me as weak and going nowhere in my life

Victor - I had the courage to leave my abuser.  That makes me a self-confident and amazing woman. I think I'm fabulous and only what I think about myself matters.

Victim - I thought my relationship was forever.  I found the love of my life and now I'm lonely, sad and angry.  Why?  I will never find love.

Victor - I will look forward and heal my relationship with myself.  I will love me and all my imperfections.  Then, and only then, I will be able to invite a partner to share my life if I choose to!


The healing power of shifting your mindset to Victor is extremely powerful and will push you and keep you moving forward.

When you are a Victor, your life is full of limitless opportunities and possibilities

Be Better     Be Confident      Be Bold     Be Ballsy     Be Happy

You Did It!        You Are a Victor!

Move Forward Toward Your Dreams and Keep Going Until You Reach Them

I help women discover the big, bold, ballsy lives they deserve!  Ready to reclaim your future and start thriving?  Book your Free Discovery Session Now!

Kick Your Life up to Thriver = Big, Bold & Ballsy

There are some who say that getting to the level of "survivor" is good enough.  I say no way, not a chance.  Putting your life into "thriver" gear is where you want it to be.

After my experience with an abusive husband, I truly believed that my end-game was to go from victim to survivor and be happy with that.  It was great to be a survivor for a while.  But I felt uninspired.  Something was missing and I was caught asking myself: WOW! I did all that work to get here and now I'm a little bored.

I discovered that I wanted more from life.  I wanted to be more than a survivor, I wanted to Thrive.  I wanted a big, bold, ballsy life where I flourished.

If you have gotten yourself all the way to the level of survivor, then challenge yourself to take your life all the way up to thriver.  You'll be so happy you did.

Survivor versus Thriver

S:  Feels she doesn't deserve nice things & will never have a happy, fulfilling life

T:  She wakes up and feels Gratitude for everything in life.  She knows how to Make it a Great Day!

S:  She has low self-esteem and still has moments where she feels unworthy, guilt or ashamed.


T:  A vibrant woman who sees herself as an inspired, confident, and fabulous person.  She knows that she is worthy of all the happiness, laughter, joy and adventure that is now part of her everyday life.

S:  Her own needs are right at the bottom.  Saying no is almost impossible.  She wants everyone to like her and avoids conflict at all costs.


T:  The thriving woman places herself first because she knows that a happy, nourished self is the best one.

Once you're a thriver, your emotional, mental and physical health will be optimum.  Daily irritations will turn into daily smiles and laughs.  You will enjoy being with people. Equally, you will enjoy your own company and being on your own.

You've already come a long way on your healing journey.  Stretching your goal to thriver is not far-fetched.  It's completely doable.

Being a survivor is only a stepping-stone on your healing journey. Choose to take one more step and push your life into "thriver" gear.  

You are so worth it + you deserve it.