Do You Know What the Biggest Suck to Your Confidence Is?

The people you hang out with!

Take a good hard look at the people you associate with.  Are they negative-nellies?  Poo-pooing your every idea?  Do they look at you and say negative stuff about your appearance?  The way you dress? Do they constantly tell you what you "should" do, think or say?

If any of that is true, then you are hanging around people who are sucking the self-confidence right out of you! Every drop of it.
.
By the time your day is done, you've had your ideas shot down, You've been told that you should do something or behave some way or change something.  You face questions all day long that make you think twice about your choices.

It's no wonder you get home and seek solace from the world outside.  After all, hiding is better than listening to all the negative noise.

If you end your day wondering if there is anything at all good or wonderful or worthy about yourself, then it's time to change the people you hangout with.

How to Take it Back! 

Your Confidence and Your Self-Worth are 

Your Most Valuable Assets

For the next few days, listen to what people are saying to you and at you.  Really listen and be honest with yourself.

During quiet moments, reflect on what you heard and who said it. Write it down.  Is there a pattern?  Does someone in your circle consistently put you down or make you question your decisions? Who is the person?  Close relative?  Friend?  Acquaintance?  Co-Worker?  Spouse?

Do Not Make Excuses For Them.

Time to Keep, Edit, or Delete

Keep:  Who brings you joy, lights you up, lets you be your true self?  Who encourages and supports you to move forward in your life?  These are the people you want to keep in your life.  Your time with them will be prioritized over all other relationships.  

Edit:  Some people you love and care about, but you want to tweak the relationship to increase your satisfaction.  Decide how much time you want to invest in improving the relationship?  How specifically do you need the relationship to change?  Engage in open, honest conversations and you will find a new way forward.

Delete:  Who do you need to let go of?  Who is standing in your way with their continuous negativity and put-downs?  Who is not supportive of you?  Letting go can be uncomfortable, emotional and difficult, but you have to go through with it in order to gain the confidence to live your life the way you envision.

Once you have edited or deleted negative-nellies from your life, you will have more time and energy for the people and relationships that fulfill you and lift you up.  Your self-confidence will grow and you will less stressed and much happier.

About Susan Ball:  Susan inspires her clients to live the life of their dreams with passion, joy, and love. Susan is an experienced international Life Coach helping people discover and live their ideal life through NLP, Mindfulness, and G.R.A.C.E.

Learn more about Susan by visiting her Online, on Facebook

Practice Gratitude in times of Darkness

I am a firm believer in the power of Gratitude.  I also hate winter - shivering, cold, dark winter.

My attitude of gratitude is strongest during the winter.  It is what keeps me smiling and looking forward.  It is a blessing to be able to look outside and be grateful.  Otherwise, I would probably get labelled with some debillitating dis-ease.

In times of Darkness, there is always something to be grateful for. Period.

Winter is long in Canada and cold.  Yesterday it was -34C.  Only a short walk with the dog because the ground is too cold for his feet.  As we walked in the bitter cold, I chose to focus on what I was grateful for.  This is what I discovered:

• the bright blue sky. It was stunning.
• my leg warmers.  Last minute addition but they allowed me to climb snow banks and not get snow in my boots!
• hot chocolate.  Yummy.  Looking forward to a big cup at home.
• smiles. Even though it was freezing, I met others and we would share a smile and a frosty Hi.
• crunchy snow.  I love the sound.  

By choosing to focus on things I'm grateful for, I actually enjoyed my winter walk.

Gratitude is about finding the smallest hint of good in the bad.  Turning the negative into a positive.  Finding a hint of blue among the darkness.

Start turning the darkness into light.  Focus on what you are grateful for.  Include things you take for granted - walking, talking, health, love, a home, heat, food.

One act of gratitude today will have a positive impact.  One act of gratitude will grow into two and then three and then several.

Practice.  When you are challenged, think about something you are grateful for - going home, a delicious dinner, the sunshine.  You'll smile and your challenge will seem easier to handle.

Winter is here for a while.  I will hold onto my Attitude of Gratitude to lessen the challenge of the darkness and the bitter cold.

About Susan Ball:  Susan inspires her clients to live the life of their dreams with passion, joy, and love. Susan is an experienced international Life Coach helping people discover and live their ideal life through NLP, Mindfulness, and G.R.A.C.E.

Learn more about Susan by visiting her Online, on Facebook

Compliments - Take One and Then Pass It On

When was the last time you gave yourself a compliment?  Probably never.  Well, maybe a few times sarcastically!

Mostly, we spend our time "wishing" that someone, anyone would notice and then give us a compliment.  You know those little words of encouragement that we crave.

Waiting and wishing and hoping that someone will notice you and give you a compliment, causes your self-esteem and self-worth to plummet.

Essentially, you're relying on others to define your worth and make you feel special and that's a losing battle.

The time has come for you to rely on you for daily compliments.

Yup, you are going to give yourself compliments 

each and every day!

When you finish a task including washing the kitchen floor, take a second to tell yourself "Great Job!".  After you get dressed, look in the mirror and say "I'm rocking this outfit!".

Daily compliments have a trickle effect on your confidence, self-worth and self-esteem.  And before you know it all those trickles add up and you have built yourself a fantastic river of confidence.

Once you have a beautiful, flowing river of self-worth, it becomes next to impossible for anyone to divert your course.

Self-Worth - Self-Esteem - Confidence can be easily built when you add compliments to your daily life.

Stop looking to others to build you up because it won't happen.

Start your own "I Will Give Myself a Daily Compliment" practice.

Oh, please take your compliment and then pass a compliment on to someone else.



About Susan Ball:  Susan inspires her clients to live the life of their dreams with passion, joy, and love. Susan is an experienced international Life Coach helping people discover and live their ideal life through NLP, Mindfulness, and G.R.A.C.E.